Lenses of Reflection: Envy
Envy is often viewed as a negative emotion that can lead to feelings of inadequacy and resentment. However, it’s important to recognize that envy is not the root problem, low self-esteem is. Understanding this distinction is crucial for personal growth.
Low self-esteem refers to how we perceive our own worth. To clarify, self-worth is our intrinsic value—it’s what we are worth at our core, similar to a PDF file that is non-editable. In contrast, self-esteem is our perceived valuation of that worth; it reflects how we think we measure up in the eyes of ourselves and others.
Low self-esteem often manifests when we perceive ourselves as worth less than we truly are. This misperception typically arises from internalizing the negative views others have projected onto us. When we allow external valuations to take precedence over our own self-assessment, we allow self-doubt to flourish.
Envy, like other negative emotions, serves as a pointer to something deeper—a signal indicating an unmet need stemming from low self-esteem. It is our higher self’s way of communicating that we desire something meaningful in our lives but may feel unworthy or incapable of pursuing it, leading us to believe we don’t deserve certain experiences, achievements, or relationships.
When we experience envy, it’s essential to pause and reflect rather than judge or suppress the feeling. The question we should be asking ourselves is: What is this feeling trying to tell me? Envy can provide valuable insights into our desires and aspirations and is an opportunity to explore what we truly want to incorporate into our lives.
To transform envy into a constructive force, consider the following questions:
What do I truly want?
What is it about others that I wish to attain or experience?
What steps can I take to achieve that? What barriers are blocking my path? Are these barriers self-imposed, based on limiting beliefs, or rooted in the opinions of others?
What does success mean to me personally?
Whose negative opinions am I internalizing? Whose voice influenced my self-perception
How can I protect my sense of self and energy?
Could it be beneficial for me to set clearer boundaries? Might exploring a change in my surroundings help foster a more supportive environment?
Envy means we have work to do. When we can learn to embrace it as a signal for growth and self-discovery, we can take meaningful steps toward nurturing a healthier self-esteem.
